Primum opifex, altus prosator, ad terram viviparam et cunctipotentem sine ullo pudore nec venia, suscepto pluviali atque discinctis perizomatis, natibus nudis uti nati fuissent, sese adpropinquans, flens et gemens, in manum suam evacuavit

(Latin): First the craftsman and the eminent prose maker, without any shame nor any apology, having loosened his raincoat and undone his trousers, and walking barefoot, his buttocks also as bare as when they were born, then drew near to the life-giving and all-powerful Earth, and, with tears and groans, he evacuated into his own hands.